A sailor meets a pirate in a bar, and they talk of their adventures on the sea. The sailor notes that the pirate has a peg-leg, a hook, and an eye patch.
The sailor asks "So, mate, how did ye end up with the peg-leg?"
The pirate replies "We were in a storm at sea, and I was swept overboard into a school of sharks. Just as my men were pulling me out, a shark bit me leg off."
"Wow!" said the sailor. "What about your hook"?
"Well...," replied the pirate, "We were boarding an enemy ship and were battling the other sailors with swords. One of the enemy cut me hand off."
"Incredible!" remarked the sailor. "How did ye get the eyepatch?"
"A seagull dropping fell into me eye," replied the pirate.
"Ye lost your eye to a seagull dropping?" the sailor asked incredulously.
"Well," said the pirate, "it was me first day with the new hook."